“Show me that smile again
Don’t waste another minute on your crying
We’re nowhere near the end
The best is ready to begin.”
I have growing pains. No, that is not a declaration of acquiring the beloved 90’s TV series on DVD or a reference to how my pants don’t fit properly anymore. I’m talking growing pains – the “I’m growing up and I’m an adult but I still don’t know what to do with my life and I know I’m not going to be an astronaut anymore but I just am not sure where this whole thing is going” type of growing pains. If it were up to me, I’d rather this be about Kirk Cameron, but it’s not.
I really am not trying to complain. Quite frankly, this all seems a little self-centered. I feel like Derek Zoolander, staring at a mud puddle, asking “Who am I?” His question is mine lately…”I guess I have a lot of things to ponder.”
I remain unconvinced that there is one solitary thing every person was meant to do and until you find “the thing” you will forever feel like a piece of driftwood in the sea. But I am starting (I’m a little slow) to see that there are things I probably should NOT be doing…which makes me think that there are probably things that I should be doing too. This is a question I posed to some of my friends…what is that thing or things I should be doing that if I weren’t, someone somewhere is getting robbed? I don’t think this is a egotistical question. On the contrary, I think it’s the opposite – the opportunity to be in a place where others are truly benefiting because I am being what they need me to be. Ironically, the journey to serve others in this way has begun with a whole lot of me. Honestly, I’m ready to be done.
[end note: as my header says, i’m just talking this through. please don’t feel “guilted” in any way to tell me how great i am. i hope i’m not that shameless!]